Rude Facebook friends can be dangerous to your relationships with the rest of your network. Imagine someone plastering an ad for their business to the side of your office building? Or a neighbor planting a campaign sign for a candidate you’re not crazy about in your front lawn? You would take down the ad and the sign without worrying about hurting the feelings of the person who put it there.

Unlike the clear examples above, the rules of social networking can seem a little fuzzy at times. It’s important to take control. You can decide on editorial standards for your “newsfeeds” or “walls” so that you can keep rude Facebook friends from hijacking your conversations with the rest of your network.

There are no 1:1 relationships in social networking.

E-Mail is 1:1. Social networks are 1:MANY. As soon as you accept a request to connect with that woman you worked with a few years back, you have access not only to her individual profile information, you have a window into her online social interactions via her “newsfeed” or “wall.” You can see links to items that reflect the shared interests of her community as well as the conversations she’s having about these links with her other connections.

Your newsfeed tells as much about who you are as your static profile.

Now think of what this woman will see when she visits your profile. Let’s assume this is a profile where you hope to primarily make business connections. You’re careful about what you post, but are you careful about what is being shared on your wall by others in your community? Are they items of genuinely shared interest or are they the equivalent of ads plastered to the side of your office building? Do conversations around controversial posts ever devolve into unproductive banter?

Set Your Editorial Standards

Every newspaper and magazing has a set of standards. You’re not going to find fashion advice in the pages of the Economist any more than you’ll find a long expose on the Nuclear Summit in Glamour. No one is going to begrudge Glamour for not posting a letter to the editor about the World Bank. It’s not a part of their agenda. There are other magazines for that. In the same way, how you manage your community should be a reflection of who you are, not an open forum for friends to post irrelevant ads or promote their personal agendas. They have their own newsfeeds for that.

1. Decide on a primary purpose for each profile. Some are personal, some are for business and some will be a mix. But make sure you’re clear about your goals for each.

2. Imagine the “personas” of your connections. What are you looking to accomplish via a particular profile? If it’s only to expand your business, think carefully about how you want to interact with the members of that community. What connected them to you in the first place? What would stimulate the kinds of conversations that would lead to deeper business relationships? Conversely, what kinds of conversations should you steer clear of in order to keep the professional nature of these relationships strong?

3. Go to your newsfeed and make some editorial decisions.

• Has anyone posted pure ads that don’t reflect any shared interest at all? Click “remove.”
• Has anyone posted inflammatory discussion items or polarizing political comments that don’t have anything to do with growing your business relationship? Click “remove.”
• Has anyone questioned your value proposition or made an on-topic comment that contradicts your assumptions about a posted article or comment? Click “respond.” This is what Social Networking is made to do: foster conversation. Just remember to keep it cool, on topic and don’t take criticisms personally.

If a conversation is derailed by a member of your community who starts down a road that conflicts with your editorial standards, you have some tough decisions to make about your future with this connection. What might satisfy this one person may not be good for your community as a whole.

We’re all in this together.

The refreshing thing to remember is that most people in your community are just like you. We’re in these networks to lift one another up. But the longer you stay in the game, the more likely you’ll be to encounter people who are looking for a place to vent their frustrations, push their agendas or plaster their unwanted ads. But never forget that you are not at their mercy. You have just as much control over your own newsfeed as the Economist or Glamour does. Anyone who begrudges you this may not be looking out for your best interest. That’s your job.